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Why Dogs Are Better Than Lovers
It's acceptable to have more than one dog at a time
It doesn't matter if they're the same sex as you
You only have to give dogs one meal a day, you don't have to cook the food and they lick their dishes clean
Your dog doesn't mind if you pass wind, and in fact, will probably get some level of enjoyment from it
Dogs can't brag about who they have slept with
Dogs don't mind wearing a collar and a chain
Dogs are happy if you stroke their fur not their ego
Dogs can please themselves
The worst social disease a dog can give you is rabies, and you get to destroy the one that infected you
Snoring dogs can be put outside in the middle of the night
Dogs don't take up as much room in the bed, and they don't complain if you hog the blankets, snore or thrash about
Dogs don't care if you destroy delicates by washing them with work clothes, even though you have been told a million times not to do it
Dogs can't leave the seat up
You don't have to clean up after them when they vomit
Dogs like it when you give them chocolate ice cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner
You can train your dog
You can send your dog to a boarding kennel when you go on holidays
It's cheaper to register a dog than marry a lover
(Yes, this definitely includes Hong Kong)
You don't need a mortgage for a dog house
Dogs don't criticise your friends
Dogs are never threatened by your intelligence
Dogs never ask questions
Dogs don't hog the phone, the remote control, the computer, the shower, the toilet, the television or the car
Dogs don't care what movie you bring home
Dogs don't care that you forgot the milk, even though that's why you went out in the first place
There's never any doubt that a dog loves you
Dogs are not vegetarians
You never wonder if your dog is good enough for you
Your dog never wonders if you're good enough for him/her
Dogs happily settle for a bone for Christmas
You can always pick up a dog
Dogs never make you sleep on the wet spot
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